On August 11th, 2023 August Golden was murdered in the backyard of his, and many of my loved ones, home. August was my best friend, my partner, and the person I felt most like myself with in life.

Two and a half years ago I did not know how to play guitar, much less sing and play guitar, much less write and sing my own songs on guitar. It took many frustrating winter nights and practicing every day to get to this point. It also took August’s patience and presence, and consistent encouragement every step of the way. He received countless voice memos and videos of my failed covers, scrapped chord progressions, every single thing I’ve ever created with this instrument went through him before I’d crash land it into the view of the internet or a friend or in front of a crowd.

I not only respect his taste and insight, I genuinely loved sharing this incredibly vulnerable and new passion with him. He challenged me to try new things, he made himself available to help but didn’t baby me, he held my hand but believed in me and my decisions, creatively and otherwise. It’s woven into the fabric of our relationship, watching him start a band again after seven years of not having one. Playing together the few times we did. Exchanging voice memos after our respective band practices. Knowing each other's songs before anyone else.

The void August's absence created is immeasurable. Since the shooting, I have spoken to hundreds of people, read countless tributes, and attended three memorials in his honor. Every story about him carrying the same theme; August was the biggest fan of his friends, and he'd be there ready and eager to help if the opportunity arose. The support I, and others have received due to this tragedy is unprecedented. I would not be waking up every morning aimlessly finding my way in a post-August world if it weren't for the strength and support of my community and beyond. It's mind boggling to think that thousands of people live their life with the burden of gun violence strapped to their back, and don't have a fraction of the support we all deserve.

I dedicate this collection of songs to August Golden and his family, my family, my vast community, every friend I've ever lost, those who (like myself) struggle with addiction, and to those that bear the weight of grief and violence, on a personal and state sanctioned level.

Thank you for the endless support, patience, and encouragement.

Love,

Caitlin Angelica

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Now I Know, The Hum of Your Voice, and A Thing I Won't Find were written in the months following August 11th, 2023. All other songs were written between November 2021-May 2023.